


Never Invite A Protocol Droid

by Merfilly



Category: Buck Rogers in the 25th Century, Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alcohol, Crossover, Diplomacy, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-03-11
Updated: 2009-03-11
Packaged: 2017-10-15 05:18:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/157425
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Merfilly/pseuds/Merfilly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The <em>Searcher</em> winds up in Coruscant space. Diplomacy ensues...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Never Invite A Protocol Droid

Having a strange ship just fall out of hyperspace was not an every day occurrence. The _Searcher_ had apparently been caught in Coruscant's planetary defenses, jerking it out and causing a good bit of damage in the doing.

Of course, with the strange humans aboard, speaking a form of Basic that was anything but, _and_ with Leia having scaled back her governmental duties in favor of Jedi training, Mon Mothma had decided no other ambassador would do, but the famed Princess of Alderaan and her ubiquitous protocol droid.

Leia was of half a mind to make Threepio go with Han from now on, to lose that convenient excuse.

Meeting on the _Searcher_ was an impossibility at this time, due to its lack of hull integrity. Several of its main crew members were still in bacta tanks, recuperating from the injuries and oxygen deprivation as they scrambled to get into suits while the hull was barely shielding them. That left Coruscant, but the idea of holding the meeting in the officious government buildings palled on Leia's nerves.

She settled, instead, on a small lounge where she knew the owner, was fairly certain of the security there, and could commandeer a privacy booth in order to meet this Admiral Efram Asimov.

Her first communication to him to name the place, time, and arrange a guide to bring him there left her with a taste of why Mon Mothma had passed this one on to her. He sounded officious, testy, and a trial to diplomacy. Maybe, with any luck, it was just the interpreter droid, and Threepio would be better at handling things.

`~`~`~`~`

This planet, Efram had decided, was possibly the very definition of bureaucratic hell. First, they didn't speak the Standard language. No, really, before that, their planetary defense systems were downright hostile without provocation. Granted, no one on his ship could explain to him just what that null space phenomenon they had fallen into truthfully was, but it still just seemed wrong to drag a ship out of it in such a way as to damage the vessel almost to the critical point.

Now, the leaders he had established communication with had pawned him off on some pretty little princess of such and such, expecting to mollify him over the damage to his ship and the injuries to his crew. It made him wish he could turn the tables on them and send Deering, but of course she had gotten injured in the confusion, and Rogers was sitting at her side in a medical facility.

He decided he'd wear his standard uniform, not wanting the fuss of a dress uniform when he was in unfamiliar surroundings. With the proliferation of robots running around, he debated taking Crichton, but the robot had a habit of being insufferable, and Twiki was out of the question. He'd cope with the 'protocol' robot assigned to guide him to the meeting, and just endure the proceedings with a mind to forcing accommodations to go his way.

`~`~`~`~`

C-3PO, beleaguered protocol droid, had been, too often, the victim of folly committed by humans. He could, and would, enumerate them all, given half a chance and plenty of time.

Tonight was, by far, the worst in which he was only attempting to perform his duties. Translating the strange human's language was a simple task, as was translating the Princess's words in turn.

He could not, though, either think for them or make them actually listen, apparently, despite his numerous attempts to at least direct them into more logical paths. The Princess, as always, was being her generous self, offering full repairs and restitution for no more than the opportunity to study such a distant offshoot of humanity. The visiting admiral wanted exactly what was being offered, but kept impugning the honor of the Princess, by implying that the Republic would use any such observations to make war on his people somehow.

As if the Republic had the credits, resources, or time to look beyond beating back the remnants of the Empire, C-3PO thought to himself. Because obviously his opinion mattered not at all to these two humans. Then again, when did it ever truly matter, when humans were involved?

Seeing that the Admiral was growing increasingly frustrated, and the Princess was beginning to look like she had studied more with her brother using a lightsaber, C-3PO did the only polite thing for such an event and served them both with plenty of alcoholic beverages to lubricate the social atmosphere. Perhaps, if they relaxed a little, logic circuits would begin to function.

`~`~`~`~`

Buck looked at the Admiral as he came in much worse for the wear, and raised an eyebrow. The often officious, slightly cantankerous officer muttered something about alien drinks, enabling robots, and princesses with mind powers before going to his part of the suite and shutting the door to sleep it off. Buck was going to have a great story for Wilma when she got out of the medical facility today, he decided.


End file.
